Break Ups
Philadelphia, PA
1984
My parents had six kids in seven years and then eleven years
later, they hatched another kid, Brian, the family prince. By the time Brian
was 14, we were all out of the house. Several of us were already married, with
kids and a mortgage and all the other joys and burdens of adulthood.
At one family gathering, Brian was really down. He was so sad. His girlfriend, his first girlfriend, had
dumped him for his best friend. Brian was devastated and we all wanted to beat
up the girlfriend and his friend. But we didn’t and we tried to offer words to
console him, just something to lift his spirits and let him know that life will
go on. But no words helped this broken
14 year old heart. So we stopped trying.
But one brother-in-law thought he would give it one last
try. He patted Brian on the back and told him, “The first one is the hardest
and then the rest of the breakups, you get used to them. They don’t hurt as
much. Girls just break up with you. You just have to be used to it. You’ll be
alright.”
Bill’s comment resonated with the rest of us. And while these words may not have been
helpful to Brian on this day, future break-ups did not seem to be as
devastating.
